this is so hard. i keep telling myself that this is not what i want but i still find that i question my desision too much that maybe it is something that i do want, but too stubborn to addmit too. there is so much i want to say and tell you, but i keep them to myself because im too scared to find out where it may lead. this is hard because no matter how much i try to let go of everything your still here. its confusing for me because ive gotten over it and at the first sight of you i ended back where i started. its annoying because no matter how much you say it, i want proof because your words dont seem enough for me. you say things but then your actions speak differently to your words.
its been soo long. you've put me in this same place before and nothing seems to have changed. and ive kept telling myself that i dont want you. but its so hard to stay away from you. we leave eachother confused. no matter how much we talk about it, i still dont know what i want, i dont know what you want from me. i dont see the point in starting something that we know will end how it usually does. there is nothing 'brand new' about us. but then i dont want to push you away because you may stay away. i dont want to pull you in because it may not be what i want.
this is so typical of us. sometimes maybe friendship is where we should leave it. we havnt had the chance to have that...maybe because friendship is not what we want. we lay between the lines of friendship and relationship. bad thing?
"if you love someone tell them because hearts are often broken by words that are left unspoken"
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